Sean Convey, in The Seven Habits of Highly Effective Teens, give the following statistics with communication:
7% of what is communicated is in words.
53% of what is communicated comes from body language.
40% of what is communicated comes from the tone & feeling reflected in our voice & how we say the words.
Thinking about Covey's statistics and the guidelines from our textbook, choose two of the following scenarios and respond to how you would react in this parent-teacher situation.
Scenario 1: During a parent-teacher conference, a parent confronts you about their child receiving his/her first B, which was in your class. The parent insists that the child is an "A" student and wants you to change the grade.
Scenario 2: You catch a student copying another student's work and make a call home to explain the situation to the parents. The parent insists that the student would never do something like that.
Scenario 3: In your class, a student calls another student an inappropriate name. his behavior has occurred in the past and it is time to make the phone call home.
Scenario 4: A student has refused to complete their homework and this has been ongoing for the past three weeks. You have requested that parent(s) come in for a conference.
Scenario 1
ReplyDeleteI would make sure that I had all the necessary data to provide to the parent showing them how they had come to earn their grade. I would have some sample assignments and tests to show the parents as well. During the conference, I would maintain positivity and professionalism. Eye contact and showing that I care with my body language and voice tone would help would make sure that the environment was comfortable. I would allow the parents to talk about their concerns as to why their child did not deserve a B. After showing them the data and explaining how the child got the grade they did, the parents would be given a chance to still dispute it. If we could not come to an agreement, I would be sure to let the parents know that I would make sure that they left satisfied. I would offer them a chance to come back for another meeting with me and the counselor and principal.
Scenario 4
Before the conference, I would make sure and have all the assignments that were missing listed so they could see what the child needs to do. Hopefully, this isn’t the first time that the parents were notified that their child was not doing their homework. I would make sure the parents were comfortable when they came in and I would start off with something positive to say. I would then express my concerns with them and show them what their child was missing. I would ask them if something has been going on that maybe has affected their child in a negative way. I would allow them to talk to me and offer their insight into the situation. We would come up with a solution together on how we can help their child. If I felt that something else was going on at home that maybe the parents did not want to discuss, I would offer them a chance to talk to the counselor if they wanted. I would also offer to set up an appointment with the counselor for their child if they wanted. I would show them that I care for their student and that I am there to help them.
Scenario 1
ReplyDeleteMost parents are worried about their child’s grades and want them to be successful. In one of the classrooms that I work in the teacher has everything that is due on the board. Some of the worksheets are given as homework, but she goes over the directions in class plus does a few questions with the students. Every two weeks she prints off their grade and shows a list of the assignments. It shows what they are missing and how many points per assignment. The student is allowed to turn their assignment in until the quarter grades are in, but they receive a lower grade for being late. The teacher will look at each sheet and talk to the student about the issue in private. She will tell them that she is calling home. This usually gets the student on the ball. The thing I have learned is that is most parents do want to know about situations and they feel successful if you are working as a team. I learned that you need to follow through with your phone call and that keeping data is one of the key factors. This teacher has all her ducks in a row. She has assignments on the board, paper printouts to show students and parents, calls home to keep a parent informed, and she tracks all data. If she were to sit down with a parent she could remain calm and informative. She would be able to show them why they were receiving a lower grade and what they could do to get it where it should be. Having the child present is a great way to make a point, the student wouldn’t have any more excuses and they would feel involved in the education process. Leaving the meeting on a positive note is a must, but if an agreement is unavailable, and make sure another meeting is available with a principal or counselor present. In a situation like the first one remain firm about your decision, keep data available, remain calm and nonthreatening, keep in contact with the parent, and try to end any meeting on a positive note.
Scenario 2
This scenario involves cheating and no parent likes to hear this. One of the teachers at my school had this happen the other day and I was surprised about the students involved. It is hard for a student to say no to a peer, especially if that peer is very popular or dominating. Some students do not realize that someone is trying to cheat. If I was in this situation I would talk to the students after class and see if one was aware that the other was cheating. If both were aware than a phone call home to both sets of parents would be a must. I think a meeting with the parent, student, principal/counselor, and teacher would be for the best. I think that as a teacher you should meet separately so that it can be made confidential. I do not think one should embarrass the student in front of class; it might cause them to resent you as a teacher. In the meeting with a parent, child, and staff you should try to remain calm and non-threatening, make everyone comfortable (although most students will not be), and try to come up with a solution to the situation. In my experience as a parent, when my child was being cheated off of (she was aware that they were cheating), there was a meeting with each of the separate families. Each of the students were made to take ownership and had to come up with a punishment, the punishment wasn’t a 0, but each student had to take the test again. My daughter received one grade lower than what she would have and the other student two grades lower. By making the students aware of consequences they were able to show ownership and learn a lesson. If a parent insisted that their child would never do that, a meeting with all parties is required. Remain calm, listen, and try to find a common solution. I know that it won’t be easy, but from what I have heard from teachers is that most children, when involved in a meeting like this, tend to change their story.
Emily,
ReplyDeleteI think that the key to any situation is to have your data available. I agree with the calm and positive manner. I like that you are willing to put forth every effort to keep the parent and child informed and make them feel comfortable and nonthreatened. Giving everyone a chance to be heard makes everyone feel successful. Giving parents the opportunity to talk with you and others goes a long way. It speaks of your credibility,caring, and positive attitude. Keep up the good work and thank-you for your insight I will be sure to keep it in mind when I am in similar situations.
Holli,
ReplyDelete"If it isn't documented then it didn't happen". That teacher was well prepared and get the parents well informed. Sending home the homework assignments and grades and such are a great way for parents to track their child's progress. Also, they shouldn't be surprised come report card time. As for the cheating goes, it is a good idea to keep the conferences seperate from those involved. If the parents wanted to get together afterwards, accommodations should be made to make it happen. It is often times scary to make that phone call home because you never know how the parents are going to react.
(Q) During a parent-teacher conference, a parent confronts you about their child receiving his/her first B, which was in your class. The parent insists that the child is an "A" student and wants you to change the grade.
ReplyDelete(A) Grades are earned and I can’t just change them. I would like to get out some of Bob’s work and we can look over it together and see what has caused the grade to drop. These Conferences have the student direct them so, I would like to ask Bob to explain in his words what has happened and what he can change to bring his grade up. I would offer the parent a phone number to reach me at and in the future if they would like to be more informed on the students’ progress they could leave a number to be reached.
(Q) A student has refused to complete their homework and this has been ongoing for the past three weeks. You have requested that parent(s) come in for a conference.
(A) I would start with the student’s strengths, what he does well, and then talk about the lack of motivation to do the homework. I would ask if anything has changed at home. Talk about what the homework policy is and what occurs when it is not handed. I would ask the parent what they think will help motivate him or encourage him to meet that expectation. Come up with a behavior modification plan for future reference in case a few incentives don’t work.
Emily, Being well prepared is a key element to a successful conferences in my opinion I have yet to have one but, I am relying on that. I like how you mentioned your manner and body language. That can sometimes be so easy to forget when your nervous and people perceive things how they want, nervousness can be easily mistaken for unavailable or incompetent.
ReplyDeleteHolli, That is a great idea about the board with the assignments. It gave me an idea for the future, like having extra copies outside my room until the due date. The teacher doesn't have to be bothered with excuses, as long as the work gets turned in on time is what we really matters. If the student looses the assignment they can get another copy. Maybe have a sign up sheet in order to take one so you can keep track of who is a regular displacer of work.
ReplyDeleteKelli,
ReplyDeleteYeah the teacher does give the children chances. They are able to correct the work and get a better grade. One of the things that I noticed that she does with repeat offenders (I am talking about the ones that lose the same assignment twice or more times) is that she has them call home(after school or class) and tell the parent there will be a 10 cent charge per page because they have already had two copies. It works for most of them.
I too like the student led conference because they can explain why something is hard, and what they aren't telling us at home. One of the things that I know that my son has to do is to find something he needs to improve on and tell me why. They also start with strengths and their weaknesses are portrayed as things to improve on never negative. Always be prepared and document, document, document!
Scenario 1: Hopefully I was diligent this school year and sent out an introductory letter that includes my class objectives, goals, and other expectations; and hopefully I’ve informed my parents about my cool website that has all the homework and assignment rubrics available as well. If this is the case, I would reeducate my parent about the information that was already available to them. I would go over the assignment rubrics, and show them specifically why their child had earned a B in my class. I would then offer suggestions and maybe examples of what A work looks like, and how their child could raise their grade.
ReplyDeleteScenario 2: First of all, I wouldn’t be making the phone call….Junior would be! The student can explain what they did in class, and what the consequences will be. Ideally I will have a supportive principal who will back up these consequences. If not, then I’ll simply give the child a zero on the assignment and hope the parent doesn’t totally rip me new one.
Kelli: You’re student’s name is Bob? Just kidding! I thought your conference strategy was good. I too would have my data available to show the parents why their child got the grade they received. I also thought your strategy, as far as having BOB explain why he got a B in his own words, was great. Hopefully having parent hear their own child explain the situation might go over better than hearing from the teacher.
ReplyDeleteKelli: You’re strategy with the child who refused to do his homework was great. I think having the parents come in, and trying to figure out the root to the problem might possibly reveal some answers. There might simply be some big things happening at home, and frankly I can totally understand the lack of compliance to do homework if the child is depressed or angry about family/personal concerns.
ReplyDeleteScenario 3: In your class, a student calls another student an inappropriate name. His behavior has occurred in the past and it is time to make the phone call home.
ReplyDeleteI would call the parent and explain to them what is happening. Share why this is unacceptable at school. Ask the parent questions, has “Joe” mentioned if something here at school is bothering him? Is something outside of school bothering him? Offer a suggestion of punishment but also ask their suggestions on what they think would be a fair punishment. Be prepared that the parent will probably have the my kid does nothing wrong attitude and keep yourself calm and by asking them questions they will feel like you are asking suggestions not just accusing their child.
Scenario 4: A student has refused to complete their homework and this has been ongoing for the past three weeks. You have requested that parent(s) come in for a conference.
Make sure that I am prepared for the conference. Have grades and data available to show the students progress and capabilities up through the last 3 weeks. Keep the meeting informative and again ask questions. Be sensitive that something maybe going on at home and they may not share all the information. But most parents will share when something is causing poor work from a student.
Scott,
ReplyDeleteAs long as you have everything outlining progress and grades and expectations and such, realistically you should be fine. Just be prepared for those parents that have excuses and justifications for every little thing. Stand your ground.
As far as making the kid call home, great idea. Just be sure to be present when he or she is making that phone call. Kids tend to tell half of the story and its usually the half that's on their side.
Scenario #4:
ReplyDeleteI would greet the parent in a pleasant manner. I would explain to the parent what’s been going on with their student throughout the last three weeks and express my concern with for their student’s academic performance. I would have a list of all the missing work. I would show the parent how their student was doing in class before the assignments started to be ignored. I would ask if there was anything going on outside of school with their child to cause this behavior. I would use active listening to defuse the parent’s emotions. We would try to come up with a solution together. I would offer up suggestions to the parent if they had any questions.
Scenario #1
I would show the parent the data and how I came up with their student’s grade. I would also show them what assignments or tests their child had problems with and how I taught the material. I would ask them, in a respectful manner, why they thought their student should be getting an A and not a B grade?
Scenario#2 I would take both of the children's work that way there is proof that it has been copied. Before calling the parent I would confront the child about what he did and ask why he did it. I would try to have the child tell their parents themselves. Doing this would hopefully prevent the child in doing this again because having to confese to something like cheating seems to be a taugh enough punishment for the child.
ReplyDeleteChad-Having proof is always a great thing to show and explain to the parents why their child is not getting the grade that they believe the child should be getting. I also seen teachers use graphing methods because some parents like to see where their child ranks.
ReplyDeleteScenario#3. I have to deal with this now with three year olds!!! I document everything, which are called incendent reports~not so much with the name calling but this could work in the same manner, because the school age room uses this report for naughty words and name calling. Each time a child says something inappropriate the child gets an incendent report which the parents have to sign when they pick up their child. This has really cut down on the missing behavements because parents don't like having to sign something everyday, and when the child has a report they have to sit at the table and do work there not interacting with other children.
ReplyDeleteJoDee-Getting to know information from parents is good information to have that way you are getting to the bottom of why the child is being mean to the other kids. Informing the parents what has been going on at school could allow the parents to communicate to the child and see why he is acting that way. Maybe then both the teacher and parent can come up with soultion in getting the problem to stop.
ReplyDeleteScenario #1
ReplyDeleteAfter allowing the parent to give me their input and listen to their thoughts, I would lay out all of the guidelines of my class. This would include the grading scale, the assignments with points they are worth, tests/quizzes,papers, etc. I would then show the parents the scores the student got on those things and even show them samples of the students work - even "A" work and "B" work. Hopefully this will help to validate the score. I may even be able to show class averages on certain assignments depending on the course. Maybe the "B" could have been one of the higher grades if the student is an "A" student, and maybe the parents would feel better seeing that even though they didn't get an "A," they are still excelling in the class (if that really is the case.)
Scenario 2: I would make sure to let the parent know that my plan for their child is to create a learning environment that will help make them independent, productive members of society. In order to achieve that I need to grade/assess my students based on what they know/can do independently from time to time. Therefore, cheating is unacceptable. I will let them know the details in catching his/her daughter/son cheating & let them know the consequences. I will let them explain to me what their thoughts are about the situation but still make clear to them what I saw. I will also have the student with me to talk with them on the phone as well. Maybe I will have them write a note beforehand to read to their parent, to prevent other stories or excuses to arise.